Passion And Pillow Talks
by Ykarzel
Summary: When Seto and Joey fight, what's it really mean? Yaoi warning


Y/C/C (Ykarzel's Constant Chatter): Hikari Ykarzel: Okay, this could most likely be rated PG-13, cause the swearing is not that bad, and nothing REALLY happens, but just for sexual innuendo and mature themes, heh, I'll make it R. Oh, and if you review, would you all tell my Yami you like her sex scenes and to get over her identity crisis?

Warning: This was extraordinarily hard to write!! I've never wrote in first person OR present tense before ^_^' I did my best, be kind, lemme know in reviews if I accidentally fell into past tense anywhere. But this was really just something I did for fun.

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***~Passion and Pillow Talk~***

***Passion~

You glare at me, and I look away. No, not now, if we do this now, I know there's no way I'll come out on top. I'm too tired.

You start to walk over. There's a look in your eyes, maybe you need this right now. Who am I to deny it of you?

Yugi grabs your arm to hold you back. "Don't Joey. Just walk away." He hates it when we do this. 

You shake him off. "No Yugi," you growl. I stand up a little straighter, preparing myself for you. I don't have energy for this today, but you're insistent.

You pause a few feet in front of me and stand. You wait, you don't like to initiate. It's my job to make the first move. I like it that way, it puts me in control. 

"What do you want, mutt?" I growl, taking a step closer. The fact that I'm tired flees. I want to do this now, to get you worked up, to watch you react to everything I do. 

People are watching now. This is the best form of entertainment they have. It's always the same though, I don't understand why they bother. I doubt anybody pays attention to what we actually say, I know I don't. Words aren't the important part, reaction is.

And it starts, I make a comment, pull you down, break you. But you don't give up easily, where would the fun in that be? You growl, you shout, but that's all unimportant. Those actions simply accompany what I really want from you. 

I see it, that passionate fire is burning through your body again. I can tell because your eyes are a window to the flame. It clouds your mind, I become your world, all that you can see, all that you can think about.

I pause for just a moment, and as you're following my lead, so do you. You're panting heavily, but I can barely hear it over my own ragged breaths. I don't give you time to recover.

You gasp, not expecting me to start again so soon. This has to end, I can't take it anymore. The emotions you stir in me are overwhelming, and I'm acting first and thinking not at all.

Instinct; I reach out, grab you by the forearms and shove you against the wall I had been leaning on before you arrived. We're inches apart and I'm holding you down, you're staring at me with shocked eyes. I've never done this before. 

Thinking; my brain turns back on and I freeze. I shouldn't have done that, but you just push me to take drastic measures. I know that I'll probably hear about it for the rest of my life. I know I have to walk away now, before I do something else even more stupid.

"I hate you Joey!" I hiss through my teeth, all emotion pouring out of me with those words.

"The feeling's- mutual- Seto," you manage between breaths.

I hold you there for a single moment more, calming myself a little bit before I have to face the rest of the world. I slowly release my hold on your arms, taking a step back, pulling away from you.

You take one more shuddering breath before forcing your breathing to return to normal. 

"Later, mutt," I say softly. This is always the hardest part; walking away from you. Turning my back and moving on like nothing between us happened. But just as every time before, this is what I do, leave you, leaning on the wall I pushed you against. 

Part of you is broken from what transpired, but you expected that. Part of me is broken too, but I won't show it. You know what it's going to feel like when you walk in, but you always do, because just like me, you need this to get through life.

"Later is right, Kaiba!" you yell, and there's a tone in your voice. I hear a smile on your lips, and you never smile while I walk away. It's like you know something I don't. It almost makes me pause. Almost.

I've just remembered that I'm tired.

_***Pillow Talk~_

I shift my coat slightly. I'm nervous, I can't help it. After all, I've never done anything like this before. I have no idea how you're going to react. That's mostly why I'm doing this, because it's rare I don't know how you're going to react. The other reason, well I don't really understand the other reason.

I ring the door bell, suddenly wondering if you even answer your own door. Apparently you do because it opens and your clear blues are looking down at me. You look completely shocked at first, I was the _last_ person you expected to see. 

But understanding crosses your face, and you take a step back so I can enter. Perhaps you remember the comment I made earlier today. Or maybe that other reason bothers you too. That other reason:

When ever you walk away, though it's over, it never feels right to see you go.

I throw a smirk in your direction. You raise an eyebrow and I shake my head. The way we communicate is amazing. We've established that we aren't going to fight. So now you're lost.

I walk forward in a random direction, acting like I know exactly where I'm going. The silence between us doesn't bother me. Does it bother you? I grin to myself when I end up in what I assume is some sort of study. It looks like you work here.

There's a laptop sitting on one side of the couch. I fall onto the other side, not wanting to disturb it. You stare at me from the door way for a moment. You're lost, I love it.

You walk slowly across the room, sitting down on the couch between me and the laptop. For a moment, neither of us moves. I think the silence might be bothering you. Doesn't bother me. I make myself a little more comfortable. I'm communicating again. Words are overrated, unimportant. Only reaction is important.

You seem to understand that I don't intend to move for a while. You reach over to the laptop and pull to yourself, opening it and begin working. Well, I'm a little insulted, but I forgive you because your obviously uncomfortable, and your work has always been something you are completely confident in.

It's amazing how well I know you when we've never really talked. We don't need to talk, I've been studying your reactions for years, and you mine. We know each other inside and out.

Time starts to pass. Minutes, hours, I don't have the slightest clue, but it doesn't matter, because I haven't got anything better to do and you're perfectly content to sit there and tap away at the keyboard. 

My eyes grow heavy, my brain wants to slow down. I don't intend to fight it, I've got all the time in the world. I shift, leaning against you and closing my eyes. You look over for a short moment, then return to your work like this is the most natural thing in the world. I smile slightly to myself as I begin to doze.

I never really fall asleep completely. I'm just drifting slowly in and out of consciousness. You were exhausted today, why aren't you napping to? I already know the answer to this question is simply because Seto Kaiba does not nap, but I still can't help but wonder if it would be good for you. 

I drift awake enough to notice the tapping stops. I don't move, I assume you're just pausing. However when no sound comes, my eyes pop open to find you staring down at me. 

I blush slightly, and you quickly look away. Pulling away from you, I stand up and yawn. I'm communicating again, and you react. You shut the laptop, replacing it to the seat cushion beside you, and stand also. 

I walk slowly out of the room, very aware that you're following me. I reach the doorway and realize that I'm lost. Just as I was about to bull shit it, you place a hand on the small of my back and direct me.

I grin to myself, walking close beside you as we head for the door. We reach it and I turn to face you. You still haven't removed your hand from my back, and my turn results in your arm around me. You blink and I smile. I reach out and give your waist a one armed squeeze before opening the door and stepping out onto the pavement. I shut it behind myself.

The other reason is fulfilled for now. It feels complete. Not over, just complete. I can walk away.

_***Passion~_

I'm here to think. You've surprised me, but at the same time, I was expecting it. It's been four days since you fell asleep on my couch. And I'm still thinking about it. Where are you? I suddenly wish you were here. I need things to go back to what I understand.

Do you read my mind? There's laughter. You and your friends. I know that you all come to this park. Maybe that's why I came here to think, unconsciously. That's how bad I need you right now.

You look up and spot me, our eyes lock. You know immediately, today _I_ need this. You seem a bit reluctant. You glance at your friends who have failed to notice me. "Guys, I'll be back in a few minutes." They okay your departure and forget you for the moment. Only Yami follows you with his eyes.

He sees me, and my eyes meet his. I silently dare him to try and stop me. He merely smirks to himself before returning his attention to his hikari. I growl before you even reach me. How much does he know? What do you tell your friends?

I start to walk, looking very confident that you will follow. In reality, I'm only half sure you will. But we need to be alone this time. I pause near a large tree. I don't know why I always need something behind me while we do this. I just do. 

I wonder if it will be different this time because you slept on my couch. I hope not. I need what I understand. You're almost to me. I expect you to pause like you always do, but you close the distance between us, reaching up and grabbing my collar, pulling me down to your level.

"What do you want?" you growl. At first I'm shocked, but then at the same time very relieved. I understand this, even if you did make the first move, I can regain my control.

I open my mouth to respond, but never get a chance. You cut me off, and I'm shocked again. I stand there numbly, you're in control, and I'm loving it. I blink. I've never wanted to lose control before. And I don't intend to do it with you often, but it's a slight reassurance. That I don't make you do this, you want it just as much.

The fire's in your body again, and I know now's my chance. I rip the control from you violently. Physically, I reach out and grab you again, putting you against the tree. You stare dumbly. I bring my face mere inches from yours. I'm not aware of what I'm saying, it never really matters. That part's been practiced to an art, we just repeat the same things.

I stare intently into your eyes. Nobody else can do this to me, can drive me to this. Nobody else knows me well enough. There's not a single other person I would let control me the way you did just moments ago. 

"I hate you," you whisper, hardly loud enough for me to hear. Your eyes are wide, and that passionate flame is slowly fading.

"I know." I release you and pull away. Inside, I'm glad that _you_ have to walk away this time. But you don't.

_***Pillow Talk~_

I lean against the tree still, my hands being pushed into the bark by my back. You think I'm going to go back now. Well, I'm not quite ready to leave yet. You may not realize it, but you're not ready to lose me either. I stare calmly at you, my breathing slowly returning to normal. 

You wait, but I don't go. I fold my arms across my chest, and you understand. 

For a moment you look lost again. You turn as though you are going to walk away, then pause. You don't want to go. Trying to act as though it was your original intention, you walk to another nearby tree. 

You settle yourself at its roots. I push of the tree with my abused hands and follow you. I sit directly in front of you and look at you. You stare back for a moment, and I cheer inside when your cheeks tinge pink. You look away and to the side at the ground. 

Your uncomfortable again, and I understand. I take pity on you. This really is out of your element. I shift, turn slightly and crawl into your lap, my back to you. Now you don't have to look at me. 

Your entire body's stiff at first, but soon you relax. I grin because you can't see me, and lean against your chest, letting my eyes slip closed. I always want to sleep. You take so much energy out of me. Not really wanting to sleep this time, I reopen my eyes.

Your arm comes up tentatively, I can see it out of the corner my eye. But it stops, your unsure. I chuckle lightly, grabbing your arm and pulling it around my waist. I wish I could see your face, it has to be bright red. 

I can feel you breathe. It sounds dumb, but it's an intoxicating experience. I feel each breath you take, and if I try hard enough, I almost think I can feel your heartbeat, or maybe it's my imagination. It doesn't matter. I'm experiencing your life force. 

We only get a few minutes like this. "Joey!" a voice calls. It's Yami. If it had been Yugi, I would have just told him to bug off. But it's Yami, and I understand; if he saw you like this, this open and vulnerable, you'd just die. I understand that. 

I look up and behind myself at you, your bright blues are wide and scared. I've never seen you scared before. It's seeing that which made me act. I kiss the underside of your chin lightly.

Your eyes fall shut, because Yami's getting closer and your terrified but don't have the heart to throw me off of you. Don't worry, I wouldn't do that to you. I climb out of your lap, and run away. It's easier to leave if I do it quickly.

_***Passion~_

I haven't seen you in six days. It scares me that I need you to the point I can't go six days without you. It's a sad thing. Where have you been? Are you avoiding me?

I'm standing in the direct middle of the school yard, no matter where you go today I'll find you. 

The door opens and you and your friends walk out. Your eyes immediately scan the school yard, until they land on me. Good. You're not avoiding me, you want this just as much as I do. You smirk slightly, and your friends follow your gaze.

"Joey, do you have to?"

You nod at Yugi. Yes, you do have to, I'll make you. 

You walk slowly toward me. My back suddenly feels bare. I need something behind me. But there is nothing, and I'll have to deal with it. You stop a few yards away. Why so far? I don't care, or at least I pretend not to.

I try hard this time. I want to get you worked up quickly. The same old dance, and for some reason, it's not working. I don't need to look in your eyes to know I won't see the flame yet.

I take a step closer. Something's different. Is it because of what you did? Because of how we were? Now, I can't put the heat in my words. That's why. Words that never seemed important were really always needed, we just didn't notice. You've changed us. You feel it too, you look upset, and a tiny bit scared.

We yell louder. To all of them, this must look like the best one yet, but we know different.

We get as close as we can, but it isn't helping. I'm getting upset, and you already are. I try use the emotion to fuel my words. It's dangerous, I know, but I have to do something.

"I hate you!" I shout. There. There it is. A tiny flicker in your eyes. I have to capture it, feed it, make it grow and make your blood race. I reach out and grab your arm just below your shoulders. I pull you to me, crushing my lips to yours. Yours tighten as you kiss me back. My tongue darts out and pushes it's way into your mouth. The flame blazes.

My hands slide from your arms to your waist, pulling your body flush against mine. You reach up, arms locking around my neck and deepening our kiss. 

It's the most heated, passionate kiss I've ever experienced. You moan into my mouth, and I wonder where you found the breath to do it. I know we will have to part soon to breathe, but I don't want to. For right now you are my entire world, and I am yours. But the second we pull away the rest of the earth will come crashing down around us and I will realize that we're kissing in the middle of the schoolyard in front of everybody. Well, maybe I already realize that, but as of now I don't give a damn.

You pull back just slightly, enough that our lips fall apart and we can take in air, but not any more then that. You wait just a moment before pulling my head back to yours and repeating the experience. It's even better the second time. I could do this forever.

But it has to end. I break this time, pulling back enough to look you in the eye. Your arms loosen around my neck slightly, but you don't let go just yet, and neither do I. Everybody's staring at us with their mouths hanging open. What do we do now?

No, I know what you'll do. You'll walk back to your friends, and because your so close to them, they won't care, and your life will go on the way it always has. I, on the other hand, am about to stomp out of here and go home.

You look a little scared, a little nervous, and the only way I can tell is your eyes. You don't let it show in your posture. I'm proud of you for that. "Seto," you whisper.

I lean in and kiss your lips lightly. "Stop by my place later, Pup." That's all that you need to reassure you. Your arms fall from around my neck and I slowly release your waist. I steal another soft kiss, before doing exactly as I planned. 

I glare at everybody staring, and walk out, my entire posture shouting "fuck all of you".

_***Pillow Talk~_

There's a silly smile on my face as I walk you walk away. Once your gone, everybody looks at me, but I don't mind. I'm past caring about anything. Nothing could ruin my mood. 

What the hell am I waiting for? You're going home, I haven't got any reason to stay here at school. I shake myself from the place that I've frozen in. I turn and jog back over to Yugi and the gang. They're staring at me, just like everybody else, and suddenly I'm self conscious. These are the only people who's opinion matters to me.

I pause, unsure of what to say. Yugi gives me a sly smile. "So, is he as good at kissing as he his at everything else?"

"Totally," I answer, grinning, as the tension breaks. He's my best friend ever, and as long as he's behind me nothing matters. 

"I think I understand now why you two fight," he tells me, eyes glittering the way they often do.

I feel my cheeks heat, yet can't help but smile. "It's," I falter, trying to find the words for what you and I do. "Intense," I finish, and Yugi giggles.

"I guess so, Joey. So now what?"

They rest of my friends haven't said anything, maybe they're just in shock. (Y/C/C: Or maybe the author just hates them, hmm?) "I should go," I answer, glancing in the direction you went. "He'll be waiting for me."

"Really?" Yugi asks, his face brightening. I know what's going through his head. He doesn't really trust you, he doesn't know you as well as I do. He's not sure that you're genuine. But I know you are. I nod and pick up my bag.

"Later Yug, call me. I may not be home for a few hours, so much later. Nah, I'll just call you." He laughs at my joke.

"I want details!" he calls to me, and I wave back at him without stopping or looking back. 

I reach into my pocket and pull out my keys, crossing the school yard to head for my car. I'm very aware that everybody's still staring. Hell, you'd swear they'd never seen two guys go at it before. Well, ah never mind. I can't stop smiling, let them stare. They're just jealous that I got dibs.

The drive to your place was surprisingly short. I'm not so nervous this time, walking up to that overly large door, cameras on me, and pushing that loud bell. Well, maybe a little nervous, but it's a good thing. 

The door is jerked open the moment the bell starts to sound. I grin at you. You blush, knowing you've been caught waiting by the door. Not that I mind. I walk in, dropping my bag to the corner and my keys on top. I can feel you behind me, your not sure what to do. You're really not very good at this, but not for lack of trying. Don't worry, I'll teach you.

You walk up behind me, and I hear you pause. You're so cute when you're lost. Timidly, you place your hands on either side of my waist, then stop, unsure and lost. I'll save you this time. I take your hands up in mine and pull them around me, bringing our bodies close. I lean back, tilting my head up and kiss your cheek. 

I can see you smile slightly. "Hi Seto."

"Hey Pup." 

I just stand there for a minute, enjoying being with you. Suddenly, to you at least, I pull myself out of you arms. Taking your hand, I lead you upstairs. Making you trail behind me, I begin to open doors randomly, looking inside. As I'm not even attempting to keep track of which ones I open, it's not surprising I'm repeating doors.

"What are you looking for?" you ask as I open the broom closet for the third time. 

"Your room."

I reach for another door knob. Who needs this many doors anyway? You place a hand on my shoulder. "Why don't you try that door?" you ask pointing across the hall.

Just to be ignorant, I open the door my hand's on anyway. It's a bathroom. It might be important to know that someday.

I cross the hall and open the door you pointed to, dragging you behind me like I have a purpose. It's a dark room, navy blue carpet and walls, contrasted by the silver-white sheets on your four-poster queen sized bed. Well, at least it's not black. You should see my room someday.

I walk over and sit on your bed, motioning for you to sit next to me. "How much sleep do you get at night, Seto?" I ask as you sit. I fall backwards into a laying position, my feet still planted on the floor and stare at your back.

You wait a moment before answering. "I don't know, maybe four hours a night." The question 'why the hell do you want to know?' is unspoken but understood.

"Only four?"

You shrug, and I watch the patterns the movement of your shoulders make in your shirt. "I get home around now," you answer, "and I'm home for about two hours. Then Mokuba gets home. I spend some time with him, eat dinner with him, start him on his homework, and head to the office around six. I leave there around midnight, I'm in bed around one, and I'm up at five sharp."

I allow my eyes to slip shut. "How long have you kept up that schedule?"

You stop to think, you don't really know. "Since Mokuba stopped sleeping with me." The words come out of your mouth as the thought occurs to you, otherwise you would have never said them. The back of your neck heats as you rush to explain yourself. "He started when we were in the orphanage. He would get lonely at night, and just crawl in with me. But when he turned ten he decided he was too old for it. I was actually kinda proud of him for it." 

I hear you shrug. I think that's the most I've ever heard you say at one time that wasn't insulting. "I guess I sleep better when I'm next to someone," you say softly. Oh, that was hard, wasn't it? Admitting a weakness. You trust me. Good.

"Ever take naps?" I ask, as if I didn't know what the answer already was.

"No, why"

"I just can't help thinking you might not be so grumpy if you slept more. I'll sleep next to you."

I sit up and crawl to the other side of the freshly made bed. I lay down, resting my head on the pillow and looking up at you. Your blush is priceless. You really have no choice but to lay down beside me. I turn on my side to face you, meeting those beautiful baby blues you're blessed with.

I smile slightly, but you just stare. Sure, it makes me a little uncomfortable, but like I'm going to allow you to know that.

"Pup?" you whisper softly.

"Hmm?" Yes, I'll allow the name, but only because it's kinda cute, in a humiliating sort of way.

"What made you come here last week after we fought?"

I sigh, flipping over so my back is to you. Before you have a chance to think I'm offended, I scoot back so our bodies are pressed together. I reach back and grab your arm, pulling it over my waist. "Relationships shouldn't be completely based on sex." You chuckle. "Ah, go to sleep you rich bastard."

"You first, whimpering puppy."

"Gladly." I snuggle against you, and allow your warmth to lull me into dreamland.

Y/C/C: Hikari Ykarzel: YAMI!!!! Yami, god dammit, come out!!! *no response* *looks at readers* I freaking have a fucked up yami who won't come out of her soul room. The only way I know she hasn't killed herself is she can't. Help me!!! Get her out of there!! *grumbles* Stupid damn imaginary friends having identity crisis's. First Kevin and his "I'm not gay, just in love with Az" thing, then my Yami losing Az to a guy, and feeling she's not 'fulfilling her purpose'. Oh, I'll shut up, if you wanna her about it, IM me at KKismagic. 

Hope you liked the fic, I enjoyed writing it. If you didn't get it, here's the point: When Joey and Seto fight it's a metaphor for sex. Hopefully you got it, if you didn't, tell me so I can figure out how to make you all get it.


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